• 16:29 @Saraquse No more mall for you! Come back one year! #
• 16:37 Things to do in Dahlonega, GA, from their Chamber of Commerce website: Walk to Maine. #

• 10:41 rt @synthjock #ff @xalieri check his website - it's astonishing www.ngc2632.com/blog/ << Thanks! Where can I find more of your work? #
• 17:54 Less than a hundred pages left to go of Dick's _Man_in_the_High_Castle_. Never actually had gotten around to reading it. #
• 19:39 ...and finished _Man_in_the_High_Castle_. Definitely earned its Hugo, @grammarmonkey. @cyberpunkdreams, I could feel it fighting back a bit. #
• 20:23 Queasy from too much anxiety in my food and end-of-book system shock. #
• 21:27 @Saraquse Quite the opposite of contented cows.... #
• 21:40 @adricnet I've got yer psychomagnathearic slime right here, pal. ;) #

• 09:34 @mikodragonfly The middle ground between rage and prudence? That's prudence with a sneer. #
• 10:40 RT @adampknave CONTEST: Win a Complete Farscape set on DVD: bit.ly/92goUe << CAVEAT: You have to buy a copy of an AWESOME book! #
• 14:29 Why, yes, that _was_ one of mine that just went scrolling past on @escarp. Check out escarp.org for more! #
• 16:43 Who wants to help me upgrade and actually bake this project for the holidays? @grammarmonkey? bit.ly/8OcPvc #

• 09:36 .@writeplayrepeat What would I like for a holiday gift? A happy ending that leaves room for a sequel with all the same major characters. #
• 10:28 Rule #3: No, seriously, there is no point at all in talking about Fat Club. bit.ly/fatclub3 #
• 13:07 I meant to recommend escarp.org before they accepted my submission, but they're too damn fast. Beautiful microlit. Go see. @escarp. #
• 15:02 @mightywombat Needed video of that! #
• 22:14 Got my walk tonight without having to climb over the fence after all. Not in a hurry to go back home to stew, however. Cocoa, perhaps? Yes. #
• 22:59 Was only on fire briefly this evening. I really should try harder to notice such things. Should I get a service animal with good IR vision? #

• 08:37 #WorldAidsDay is today. AIDS is free; no coupon codes, no specials. Make sure you find out how to get it -- THEN DON'T! #red #
• 09:19 Who's the real enemy? US Military deaths so far in 2009: 144 in Iraq, 297 in Afghanistan, and 334 suicides. bit.ly/6xL34Q #
• 11:29 Manhattan Project: Totes wnted 2 b ther : bit.ly/7bcpha #
• 13:34 OH from the kitchen: "With sufficient care you can totally recycle corn, peanuts, and poppy seeds." #checkplease #
• 17:13 -photo- 18th Dynasty, recently discovered (in my house, anyway):
  
  ...and I hear that the symbolism is quite naughty. bit.ly/78UGw6 #

• 12:25 One step closer to that bacon wallpaper I've been wanting: www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/science/article6936352.ece #
• 14:11 -blog- Encephalopath: A spoonful of my brains in the cotton candy machine
  Creutzfeldt-Jakob prions, sweetened-to-ta... bit.ly/4DJ6k9 #

A spoonful of my brains in the cotton candy machine
Creutzfeldt-Jakob prions, sweetened-to-taste and caramelized
Twirled around a paper cone handle
A time bomb with a twenty-year fuse
A teaspoon of good ideas, poorly folded
Transmissible only by eating your father’s brains
And cotton candy
Stop picking on your sister
And apologize for throwing up on your stepmother
And promise you’ll do all of your spelling homework
And I’ll stop beating you with the buckle-end
Maybe
And buy you this disease on a stick
That will completely cure you of everything
Before you turn thirty
Maybe you’ll have children before you go
And I’ll teach you to make cotton candy
Taste better with nothing but
The power of your mind.

[*]

• 13:48 Enormous baked sweet potato: devoured. Will be exhibiting orangey fake tan shortly from overdose of beta carotene. Next up: pugwashing. #
• 16:57 @ashtreza I could loan them a couple and they can keep them scrubbed.... The pugs put up with the bathing okay, but drying makes them crazy! #

• 12:10 @basilicacollins @adampknave 35 looks 6.964383561643836 years younger than I look. #
• 12:12 @basilicacollins Beard and glasses and prehensile mustache with its own ZIP code. #
• 19:20 Kneeling in the warm shower, I dream the blood down my arm, down the drain. No last-minute call comes from the Governor. My eyes snap open. #
• 00:38 @lyzardly "Malt does more than Milton can to justify God's ways to man." Keep 'em drinking. #

• 14:30 @Phyrra Are you saying size doesn't matter? #
• 15:18 I know this is a bit of a reach, but if anyone can point me to references that djinn can be believers or infidels, hit me up. #
• 15:31 Oh good lord. --> Make Money Fast In Your Own Home By Sorcery and Trafficking With Demons: bit.ly/7aIBXp #
• 15:41 @mightywombat Giving value for money is the trick.... Have to come up with a theme, materials I can buy in bulk -- and maybe an Etsy store. #
• 15:59 Have to say I got some impressive autofollows in the past hour or two. #
• 18:55 OotSSoERaAAP (@sciencescout) has released a new batch of merit badges! Go see if you deserve any: www.scq.ubc.ca/sciencescouts/ #

• 10:32 Cats Who Stare At Goats: bit.ly/6C6LrG (movie poster?) #
• 13:52 @mightywombat Someone ate your lunch? Time for the Ex-Lax brownies. Or the capsicum turkey sandwich. Or the cricket-choc-chip cookies. #
• 14:21 @mightywombat You and he should go in together on those huge boxes of 'em frrom Sam's Club or Costco or whatever. It'll make them cheaper... #
• 14:48 @Saraquse Chocolate ganache on a graham-cracker crust with marshmallow layer (or topping). Maybe pecans on top. Like high class s'mores. #
• 18:45 Dubai just asked for a 6-month hiatus servicing its $100B debt. Dubai's going to be the world's strangest abandoned theme park. #
• 20:55 Missed my walk tonight. Derailed by the DoL requesting clarification of the spaghetti that is the past two years of my employment history. #
• 21:49 @The_BORG I finally had a conniption and clicked the little X on all those "Who searched for you?" ads and reported them as offensive. #
• 21:54 Confession: Whenever I see a link to the Muppets' Bohemian Rhapsody (www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgbNymZ7vqY) I go watch it. #
• 22:11 @nfpendleton So glad to share! Off to watch it again. Someone else posted it to Facebook.... #

• 12:26 RT @ariedana: post.ly/DKUr A lovely time-lapse map: 2 years of US unemployment. Happy job hunting, everyone! And I do mean everyone. #
• 13:47 Thanks, @sciencescout! Whether marmosets and shrews twitter, and why: bit.ly/4Vsar5 #
• 14:46 @adampknave @mightywombat @basilicacollins I just use Otto's Buddhist meditation that focuses your aggression before going into battle... #
• 15:57 -blog- An exercise for the reader in spacetime: Here’s the problem with astronomical/cosmological measurements of... bit.ly/5vsFDp #
• 16:56 @grammarmonkey Those would make awesome molds for dog biscuits. #
• 16:59 @adampknave Are we still calling @grammarmonkey "Danger Badger"? #
• 17:15 @nfpendleton @adampknave Been fighting crime for a decade now. I am ... The Enabler! My superhero weapon is ... Enough Rope! #
• 17:47 Sundown. Time to get out of the house and go for my constitutional. In the graveyard. #
• 20:38 @grammarmonkey Fill up the flask and take it with you. Just to be sure. #
• 23:15 @grammarmonkey That's two points off your license and a mandatory course in defensive drinking. #
• 23:20 @grammarmonkey Sometimes vomiting is the right answer. Especially if someone's trying to make you feel Bella's pain. #

• 11:07 @mightywombat @adampknave I feel I need a safe dial to glue to my door as well. Hell. I need one to glue to my car door too. #
• 11:37 is inexplicably aware that it is both Miley Cyrus and Boris Karloff's birthday today. #

• 19:39 Next table: two young psychos discuss the validity of alternatives to capitalism. I feel the unhappy attention of Economics 2.0. #

• 16:06 @starchy Rumor has it if you had removed that fat surgically and sold it to cosmetics companies, you could have come out ahead financially. #
• 00:21 -photo- In the Fold:
  
  bit.ly/8lbTDM #
• 00:53 -photo- Build me a woman:
  
  bit.ly/7uDdrk #
• 01:23 -photo- Rococo Chihuahua (cake!):
  
  bit.ly/7l5zcB #

• 12:23 @nfpendleton What's the best way to get you a copy of my micro-published novel, _Sweat_? #
• 12:54 Pootwattle versus Smedley, virtual-academic-on-virtual-academic action, Friday Special! bit.ly/pootwattle #
• 13:02 To bring the humor down to earth, a kiddie story for kiddies 18 & up. NSFW, pterosaur-on-grizzly action: pterodactyl.me #
• 14:11 @basilicacollins Agreed. Glenn Beck can call a guided tour to his back-zits news if he likes. We don't have to buy it. ping.fm/zBsld #
• 16:29 Rule #1: You do not talk about Fat Club. bit.ly/fatclub1 Rule #2: YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT FAT CLUB. bit.ly/fatclub2 #
• 16:32 Like you need a hole in your head? Trepanation support group: www.trepan.com/ #
• 19:57 Turkey comes from tuka, Hindu for peacock, applied by last millennium's most lost and confused individual: Christopher Columbus. #
• 22:51 -photo- Colorshy:
  
  bit.ly/6vIOHg #
• 23:07 Really Really REALLY enjoying radiolab.org with shows featuring Diana Deutsch, Oliver Sacks, Neil deGrasse Tyson, & Robert Sapolsky. #
• 03:29 -blog- True Confessions time: I once read a Richard Bach book.
  There’s a confession.
  Okay, maybe I read a couple ... bit.ly/4Tslbd #

I once read a Richard Bach book.

There’s a confession.

Okay, maybe I read a couple of them. Johnathan Livingston Seagull and Illusions: Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah and maybe a couple more.

But the stupid confession is regarding Illusions. And here’s how it goes.

In the book, there’s this thing, basically a magic spell, where the messiah-guy is trying to tell the narrator-guy how to fulfill his own wishes with some kind of New Age visualization technique. It goes like you imagine the thing that you want, surrounded by a brilliant glow, and this will magnetize you to it, and it should come barreling down on you out of the future like a ton of bricks.

I’m not telling you what it is I imagined surrounded by a brilliant glow. I’m just not. But I will tell you that since that day, what has been barreling down on me out of the future like a ton of bricks has been magnets. I must have found literally hundreds of magnets in the twenty years since then. I am magnetized for magnets.

Found another one today. A round one, taped to the inside of the bottom of some box like the type you might get an inexpensive necklace or bracelet in, under a pad of cotton.

Go ahead and laugh now. I know you want to.

[*]

• 15:31 @basilicacollins I have TWO beards. At least. And I think a third one in my pocket. #

• 17:19 @mightywombat You want "safe" labs in the basement, or labs with beams that might try to escape. You want "explodey" labs on the top floor. #
• 17:24 @mightywombat Exactly. The "bomb calorimeters" only go on the top floor. And windows are easier to replace than bricks or cinder block. #
• 19:01 In Decatur Cemetery after sunset, following my pipesmoke, secure in the knowledge that I'm clearly the scariest thing in here right now. #
• 19:37 @lyzardly It is. :) Sweater weather, light fog. I come here to regroup and remind myself I'm not done yet... #
• 19:45 -photo- Decatur Cemetery, termporary resident:
  
  Mrs. C---- here has only been here a couple of months and still ne... bit.ly/15Ow9l #

• 18:44 Google provides access to US laws and precedents via Google Scholar! bit.ly/1somAW #
• 23:42 Rather than thinking of myself as the voice and running narrative, I think of myself as the part for which the voice is the press secretary. #
• 23:43 I get the impression that that's backwards with respect to most other people. Also, migraines suck. #

• 15:37 ...although your qualifications are impressive, we have identified other candidates whose skills and experience more closely meet our needs. #
• 15:42 @adampknave Yeah, quite a bit of that. That was my strongest nibble. I'm feeling pretty damned low right now. #
• 15:45 @adampknave I'm sure that's not necessary. I got the impression they needed a superhuman -- seems like maybe they found one. #
• 19:14 @kaigani Maybe it's a Gordian Hairworm infestation. Look for video on YouTube. #

• 08:59 Eight invitations left to Google Wave. DM me if you're on it and want to add me or if you'd like one of the invites. #googlewave #gwave #
• 21:01 Radiolab.org just ran an awesome show on weird & beneficial parasites incl. Toxoplasma gondii w/ Robert Sapolky. Check it out! #
• 21:32 Sapolky? I meant Sapolsky. #
• 21:43 @adricnet A different animal featured in the same lecture. Mind control in rats and humans to make 'em love cats! #
• 23:28 Hmmm. www.deathswitch.com/ provides some serious food for thought. #

• 18:22 .@adricnet I love how the word for calculus is derived from "a buildup of chalk dust on slate." #anathem #
• 21:04 The sequel to 2012 would be 7138. Just thought you should know. #
• 21:10 .@oletheros The word "courage" has "cour" in it, which means heart. None of the hearts I've personally opened have had any in it. #
• 21:11 .@oletheros The liver only has courage in it if you've been drinking. #
• 22:39 @grammarmonkey Man, I still haven't seen that! (Got some hot chocolate, though. Thanks for reminding me.) #

• 08:32 .@Saraquse blasts into the must-read blogosphere: Why The Seven Deadly Sins are your fashion friends: bit.ly/fashionsin #
• 12:33 It's official: NASA says there's definitely water on the moon. And some other "intriguing stuff." bit.ly/wetmoon #
• 13:57 "[Extremadura] may have the most unemployed young people in Spain but they will be the best at masturbation." -- Pilar Rahola, La Vanguardia #
• 16:42 IF YOU MUST yank on my mustache "to prove it's real" THEN I WILL yank on something of yours "to prove it's real". #fairwarning #
• 18:45 Should I worry about NPR's Marketplace playing snippets of the Pixies's "Wave of Mutilation"? #

• 07:54 @basilicacollins You're not supposed to pay for anything on your birthday anyway. It's all good. #
• 08:38 The LHC is deciding what to play when they fire up. Go put a dime in the most expensive jukebox on earth: bit.ly/43grmy #
• 09:12 @KMJordan Apparently he didn't like himself either. I wish folks in that bad shape could find a better cure that's easier on their families. #
• 11:44 Pardon my while I go shave ... some things. I'll be back in a couple of hours. #
• 16:28 @NaefUSA hassles blogger @MommyMelee for refusing to pay to review his products? twitter.com/mommymelee for details #
• 16:51 robkroese
  
  RT @robkroese 12 minutes left. RT this and get a free ebook of #MercuryFalls. Or just RT to help out.:) mercuryfalls.net #

• 12:10 I'd like to thank my dad for visiting Vietnam a couple of times, back when I was tiny and when it wasn't so pleasant -- and for coming back. #
• 18:48 @adampknave @nfpendleton I can supply enough beard-trimmings for a 5,000-book run. I've been saving up. #
• 18:57 @ariedana That's odd. Considering what most cruise-goers are looking for, you'd think they'd let single women ride for free. #
• 19:53 "Gimme yer wallet!" Hmph. Saw a knife but no gun. Cracked the knuckles on both hands and said, "Imma wish you away to the f*in' cornfield." #
• 20:04 @kaigani I once bought a subwoofer and a CD of humpback whalesong to retaliate against one of my neighbors' stereophonic aggression. #
• 20:16 @kaigani That's ~ 13Hz. I recommend a pillow under the speakers and a good parabolic cone pointed the right direction. Echoes are a bitch. #
• 22:13 Need Van der Waals binding energies for water-to-water, -lipid, -protein to set the ultrasonic freqs of the bowel disruptor... #

• 21:32 The wife just told me she wanted to be accused of weapons snuggling. #

• 15:07 @writeplayrepeat The only non-Haiwatha Nokomis reference I know of: infomotions.com/etexts/gutenberg/dirs/1/0/8/9/10891/10891.htm #
• 16:17 @djkirkbride You're right -- they're all cartilage and keep growing until you die. But hey, that means you can just trim them back at whim. #
• 18:43 @bronxelf Obviously all that heavy media isn't stored evenly on the disks and your load is unbalanced... #
• 18:52 @bronxelf (Also consider investing in a replacement power strip and/or an extension cord that goes to an outlet on a different circuit...) #
• 19:00 @bronxelf I'm sure that's the assumption, but at five dead you _know_ it's enemy action and start looking for enemies... Any other suspects? #

• 16:34 Smoking in a cemetery as shadows lengthen, listening to the last rays knock a steady rain of leaves and acorns from the hungry-rooted oaks. #

• 09:26 .@alfie That's a wonderful addendum to Dr. Davis's 1982 account of zombies in Haiti... quite worth the read! Thanks! bit.ly/2Ujfa8 #
• 09:39 .@alfie Davis's account was "The Serpent and the Rainbow" and "Passage of Darkness", not online as such, but available as books.... #
• 09:41 .@alfie Although videoo for the Zombie Symposium I presented at at Georgia Tech, with related material, is here: bit.ly/134tz0 #

• 15:05 @tmobile_usa Now that service has been restored can you tell me why SMSs from Twitter are coming in with PST timestamps when I'm in Atlanta? #

• 11:36 Hey @moontweet! #flymeto Istanbul/Constantionple/Byzantium! I want to peel the layers back like an onion! #
• 11:59 @adampknave ... why do you want to know about my monkeys? #
• 12:06 @TheRotund I am good at cruising right over the conversational cliff's edge, roadrunner style, and never even noticing. #
• 12:12 @adampknave Perhaps I ought to review my monkey/money accounting procedures. Did you see the most recent @thaumatrope? #
• 14:04 @grammarmonkey Do you need to create a chewing gum mosaic on some painted cinderblock for old time's sake? #

• 09:47 Shouldn't let my migraine drive. Found this tab open when I woke up. Soundtrack makes the video: bit.ly/3ybeU #batoralsex #
• 13:17 If you're wondering what a #Gucci #fannypack looks like, @Saraquse is selling one on eBay: tinyurl.com/yefr4jk #

• 09:31 -photo- Biggie Oil & friend:
  
  
  
  I'm the one in the Texaco smock and the bling. I really don't know .. bit.ly/f5ly4 #
• 09:34 Well, that's October down. Anyone who didn't survive Halloween, raise your hand. #
• 16:49 @djkirkbride Step away from the gold sequined pants, man. No good will ever come of that. #
• 20:30 You know what? I think I'm going to let my migraine participate in #NaNoWriMo this year. I'm sure it can hit 50,000 words in no time. #
• 21:23 @mightywombat Hmm. Maybe I'll just let it do one word 300,000 letters long and see what we get. #
• 22:57 @mightywombat I predict it will require 5100+ hyphens. #

• 17:51 Thanks to the time change, there's a 13 o'clock for Halloween tonight. And a full moon. And Algol rises at sunset. #

• 17:52 Just found half of a tiny little snake in the front yard. And the other half. Should save it for trick-or-treaters. #
• 22:30 -photo- Like a claw coming over the horizon:
  
  
  
  (but in a good way.)[*] bit.ly/16N9OS #

• 09:44 @taniwha Not guaranteed, but substantially more likely. #

• 08:52 If earning $10/hr for annoying a small chunk of small-town GA with political polling for the next three nights appeals to you, DM me by 2PM. #
• 09:04 @adricnet I guess once you have a calling list in your hot little hands, blackmail is negotiated on a per-callee basis... #
• 10:58 @saraquse Have you gotten plans for troop movements out of her yet, or is it just name, rank, and serial number? #

• 18:10 Power's out at my house. Given that I hear only cars and planes and animals, it's probably out for my block. It's a shame. I was using it. #
• 00:56 41. I am somewhat worried about causal domain shear. YES ÄxÑ NO Ä Ñ #

• 21:12 @warrenellis The 21-year port-cask-aged Balvenie does not go in the Neti pot. #

• 12:40 Laszlo X. of Decatur: became the mayor of crappy free job-fair coffee. #
• 22:25 Wrote a new Microhappy: "Someone Understands" bit.ly/XQmWE #

• 14:59 @adricnet Check for movement. Unknown spaghetti in fridge can actually be an advance FSM expeditionary force. Maybe missionaries. #
• 15:07 @nfpendleton Gilgamesh is an art critic? #
• 15:16 @nfpendelton Wasn't trying to steal your punchline, but that's two more points than I used to have... Thanks! #
• 17:21 @starchy Did you make sure you slaughtered your tofudebeest in a kosher fashion? #
• 17:38 Just recalled a humorous discussion from days ago based on awkward confusion between the American and British uses of the word "pasties". #

• 09:02 Congrats @Alfie! :D RT @bus_tops won the Artists Taking The Lead commission, will be talking about it at @thisisplayful bit.ly/4pXOzf #
• 11:42 Paraphrasing @TheKJA: Anti-science protestors claim "gravity's a gummint conspiracy to keep the little man down." #

• 12:59 @basilicacollins You mean "Touched by an Anvil"? #
• 13:59 Who needs an invitation to @jolicloud (ubuntu-based netbook OS with awesome app and social network support)? Who wants in? I have ten! #
• 18:29 @warrenellis Halloween is a thirteen-day holiday for Goths like Christmas used to have twelve days (and now lasts for two-and-a-half months) #

• 08:54 @Saraquse It HAS been six months, hasn't it! Congratulations! #
• 09:21 Seems the choice in keeping the clients pacified at the auto shop is FauxNews. Beck, O'Reilly, ads for drugs and insurance, and cleavage. #
• 10:00 Lazlo is #Ü@&ing mayor of the Kauffman Tire on Church St, Decatur, GA. #
• 11:38 @Saraquse Angelfire? Seriously? A medical center in Philly? Did a middle-schooler get their web-presence contract? #
• 12:08 Overheard, no context: "That's like removing a tampon by tying the string to the stick on a bottle-rocket and lighting the fuse." #
• 12:10 @lyzardly Maybe those born from test tubes are more likely to be righteous. #

• 13:50 @nfpendleton That AMBER ALERT thing is a hoax. #

• 09:55 @TMobile_USA For days now incoming SMS texts from off-network are getting PDT timestamps -- I'm in Atlanta. #whassupwithat #winmo61 #tmowing #
• 16:42 Researchers have been playing with magnetic monopoles for a year and I only find out about it now? bit.ly/3fjOhO #
• 19:29 If you can't be bothered to do a self-check, then let me know and I'll check for you. #BreastCancerAwareness (Please RT!) #

• 16:39 @mrdankelly La Llorona #
• 16:49 @mrdankelly The thing that happened to her to make her think that killing her children was a good idea was the larger tragedy. #
• 21:30 -photo- Bumblebee slumberyard: bit.ly/11Gqpj #
• 21:51 My lips have gone all tingly. I usually associate that with neurotoxins, for some reason. Tip of nose okay, nails normal color... Hunh. #

• 12:50 Drop pounds while you read! bit.ly/X-NBU-COC Promote good health while slacking off! (Free fiction for a good cause! Please RT!) #
• 15:51 @nfpendleton Did you eat Steve already?!? #
• 17:49 @nfpendleton Nothing for it but to get a big tank and more crayfish and start raising your own etouffee... #